In the Gospel of Luke, Jesus calls us to include a wide variety of guests at our tables: “When you give a feast, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you” (Luke 14:13–14). For many of us, hospitality is a matter of calculation—we tend to invite those who move in our circles, those who can reciprocate, or those we believe fit the social rhythms of our lives. But as Christians, Jesus invites us to different table fellowship. He calls us to a community that honors the weak and recognizes every member as a necessary part of his body.

Recently, I had the privilege of hosting a conversation for The Reformed Deacon podcast with several brothers and sisters from across the Orthodox Presbyterian Church who live at the crossroads of faith and disability (releasing this month at thereformeddeacon.org). What began as a discussion for deacons quickly broadened into a vital lesson for every member of the covenant community. How do we move toward families with special needs—not as pity projects, but as essential brothers and sisters in Christ?

The Image of God: The Foundation of Service

Our service to families with special needs must begin with a robust theology of the image of God. It is easy to fall into the trap of valuing people based on their function—what they can contribute, how beautifully they sing, or how productive they appear. But Rev. Mike Schout, pastor of Grace Fellowship in Zeeland, Michigan, whose brother Stephen lived with a lifelong seizure disorder, reminded us that dignity is intrinsic, not functional.

“These individuals are made in the image of God and have needs, but also have wonderful gifts to share. They’re real, they’re people to know, they’re people to ask questions of. Often, in my case, Stephen was the one ministering to me, not the other way around,” Schout said.

When we view Christ’s treasured people through the lens of their disability, we miss them as people. When we view them as a fellow image-bearer, we see a friend, a fellow pilgrim, and a gift to Christ’s church.

Moving Past the “Fix-It” Mentality

For many well-meaning Christians, the first instinct when encountering a family with special needs is to help “fix” the situation. We want to offer medical advice or try to solve behavioral outbursts. However, Rev. Eddie Mercado, an associate pastor at Harvest OPC in Wyoming, Michigan, whose son, Calvin, was born with non-verbal autism, cautions us against this posture.

“As a deacon (or congregant), you have to recognize that you are not Jesus. And you ultimately cannot fix the problem of disability. Jesus promises to do that. If a deacon comes to a particular family or an individual with a disability trying to fix the problem, it’s going to lead them to frustration, perhaps even despair. And it will also keep that deacon from seeing the person across from them as a human, an image bearer,” Mercado cautions.

Our role is not to be their Savior, but to extend the love of our Savior. This requires humility that acknowledges we are all broken, though in different ways.

Same Lake, Different Boat

Author Stephanie Hubach’s concept, spelled out in her book Same Lake, Different Boat (P&R Publishing), is a helpful tool. We are all in the “same lake” (the fallen world), marred by sin and its effects, all in need of the same Savior. However, we are in “different boats”—and some families navigate waters that are significantly choppier due to specialized challenges.

Nikki Gotch, a member of Harvest OPC in Wyoming, Michigan, teaches a Wonderfully Made Sunday school class at Harvest OPC. In this class, students are taught the same Scriptures as any other Sunday school, but the delivery is adapted. Whether using an iPad talker or picture selection, the goal remains the same: the Christian nurture of covenant children. By providing these specialized environments, the church recognizes the “different boat” while keeping everyone in the “same lake” of worship and fellowship.

“We should avoid two extremes: treating people with disabilities as completely different or, conversely, ignoring the unique and often challenging circumstances that they face,” Gotch said.

Creating a Culture of Welcome

For a family with a child who might make “strange” noises or struggle with sensory overload, the fear of judgment is a significant barrier. Hillary Mercado, Eddie’s wife and mom to Calvin, said that personal engagement breaks down these walls of isolation. “Calvin often seems to be in his own little world, but he knows the people that take the time to engage with him, showing him love and kindness. When you remove the barrier of, ‘oh, there’s someone who we pity because he can’t talk to me,’ [you realize that] he has his own personality and his own way to get to know you,” she explained.

A welcoming culture is built when congregants intentionally slow down to learn a person’s likes and dislikes and warmly greet those who are non-verbal. A simple offer to sit with a child, enabling a parent to fellowship more freely, can mean the world to a family with a special needs member. Hillary notes that even if a family says “no” to an offer of help, the gesture communicates to them that they are loved and seen.

Practical Steps for the Body

How can we, as a denomination, grow in this? Naomi Schout, Mike’s wife, has taught adult special needs classes for four years. She points to the power of including members with special needs in a variety of service opportunities, once you learn their strengths and gifts.

“There are definitely ways to be creative, to involve each person. In our church, one woman [with special needs] has ‘buddied up’ with a couple to sit behind the welcome desk,” described Naomi.

Service should not be a one-way street. When we find ways for members with special needs to serve—whether as greeters, in a card ministry, or as “prayer warriors” who take requests deeply to heart—we acknowledge the intrinsic dignity of their calling as members of Christ’s body.

A Call to Action

Parents of special needs children walk through a multitude of difficulties: insurance battles, specialized diets, sleep deprivation, and the constant navigation of a world not built for them. God’s people can help to bridge this gap in a few important ways:

• Prioritizing Marriages—offering specialized childcare so parents can have a date night;
• Physical Accessibility—ensuring that the building does not have “hidden” barriers (including heavy doors, light switches that are too high for the wheelchair-bound, or a lack of sensory-friendly spaces);
• Website Communication—explaining clearly that people of all abilities are welcome in the service.

As we look forward to the day when every tear is wiped away and every brokenness is healed, may we live with anticipation for Christ’s return. I pray our churches will grow into communities where “the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind” are not just invited to the feast but are recognized as the very ones we cannot do without.

The author is associate pastor of Harvest OPC in Grand Rapids, Michigan, and member of the Committee on Diaconal Ministries. New Horizons, April 2026.